Family Relations Week 13

Divorce

I know a few people today that have been divorced and it is really hard for them. Divorce can be really tough because it will create a broken family. Some children feel that they are losing both of their parents. The divorce judge gives the children the opportunity to make the choice as to which parent they want to live with every day and they will see the other parent regularly. After the court chooses the parent the child will live with, they can feel that both their mom and dad are not there for them. Children want their parents to be back together but that rarely ever happens.

I know divorce can be hard for people. However, parents who are divorced need to work together to keep a close relationship and be involved with the children’s lives. Even if parents don’t like each other, they need to put their children’s lives first.

Family Relations Week 12

The Joy of Being a Parent

Being a parent can be hard work, but also it can be the greatest job. A parents job is to care and love their child unconditionally, no matter what. Parents help their child to be a better person and to feel love at home. Parents should always teach their children to become independent and know how to manage themselves in the world. Children can learn lots of things from parents and always follow their example. Parents can be good listeners and hear the child’s opinion. A child needs parents that listen to their problems and is comfortable talking about everything. The parents may not like what the child may say, but they need to listen in order to understand the child’s feelings. If the parents continue to do that, they can find ways to help their child and give them good advice while respecting their opinions. When a child is in trouble, it’s important to discipline them, and to do it with firm kindness. Parents can put them in timeout and tell them what they did was wrong and not to do it again. After the child is done getting in trouble, the parents can say to them “I love you, and I hope you learned something.” That will make the child realize that their parents are helping them to not repeat their actions. This will help the child follow the rules in the future on their own. If parents continue to teach and help their child to become a better person in the future, they will realize the hard work of being a parent. This can be the best job for some people. When I become a parent someday, I want my children to be taught, and I want them to know that their mother and father are always there to listen and to love them no matter what.

Family Relations Week 11

Why Fathers Are Important?

I believe that fathers should be part of the child’s life, because it will help the child have a good relationship with his or hers’ father. A father should always be there for the child no matter what. A father has the responsibility to love and care for his children. In The Family: A Proclamation to the World says, “Fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for the families.” A father can be an example and care for his children by knowing what the kids are up to at school, what they are doing with their friends, and know who your child as an individual. If a father continues to do that, he will understand the importance on being a good father and grow his relationship with his children through life.

My relationship with my dad is super positive and we are very close. The reason why our relationship is stronger is because he has always been there for me. My dad has taught me how to become a better person throughout my life. I can always go to my dad and talk to him about situations that I am going through and he always will offer positive advice. When I listen to his advice, I can solve my situations and move on through life. My dad is someone who can be kind, loving, and patience. My dad’s role in the family is the peacemaker and is great at solving problems easily. I always look up to my dad and he is a great example in my life. The more I learn from my dad, the more I become who I am today. Thanks dad for being there for me and loving me no matter what. 

Family Relations Week 10

Communication in Your Marriage

Communication is the key in building a good marriage. Communication can help solve problems in a relationship. When couples communicate and talk about how they are feeling about situations, they learn to understand where they are coming from and how they can move forward in life. During times when couples don’t communicate, they tend to argue and not listen to each other’s opinions. When a husband and wife decide to not communicate or understand each other the likelihood of them getting a divorce or becoming separated is higher.

My fiancé and I come from different environments, there are times when our opinions do not match with each other. However, when we do not agree on something, we talk about it and figure out a solution that we can both agree on. For my fiancé and me, communication is super important to us because we learn about our weaknesses and strengths by being open about our feelings. We have learned to always listen to each other. We have learned that when we have bad times and good times, we can solve it, fix it, and move on with life. My fiancé and I know that if we work together and communicate every day, we will build a strong relationship and have fun together throughout life. 

Family Relations Week 9

My Family Crisis

In the summer of 2012, right after I graduated from high school, my mom and I went to Utah to visit family and my dad went on a business trip to Texas. One day, I was hanging out with my big sister and her newborn son at her house. Suddenly, we got a phone call from our mom. My sister picked it up and our mom told us that our dad got in a bad car accident and was injured really bad. She said, that my dad was stopping, because there was traffic on the freeway. An old woman in the car right behind my dad was going 65 miles per hour and didn’t realize that she needed to stop. She rear-ended my dad’s car incredibly hard. We were freaking out and our mom told us that our dad was in the hospital, and the doctors were checking his head to make sure he didn’t have any brain damage. We were all worried that we might lose him. I was crying extremely hard when I heard about what happen to my dad. I didn’t eat that day. I remember telling my Heavenly Father, “Please do not take my dad away. I want him someday to come to my wedding. I want him to see my children. I still need him. I can’t lose my dad at age 18. My dad is the world to me and I love him very much.” It turned out that my dad was fine and there was nothing wrong with his head. The doctors had to take some of the muscle out of his two legs, in order to save his legs. Yeah, it’s gross! My dad’s two legs used to be fat and now they are skinny. Consequently, he needed to be in a wheelchair for a while. We met up with my dad the next day in Arizona, and we finally hugged him and we were so glad he was all right. During the summer of 2012, my dad had to be in the hospital a lot and have physical therapy. He did this for a year or so. After this, my dad could walk again and recovered really well.

That summer, my family and I learned that we should spend more time together, because you never know when you might lose someone you love. Throughout my dad’s accident, he was never angry or negative. He keeps everything positive, he made sure that we always had a smile on our faces while he made funny jokes. His positive attitude made the whole experience more bearable. My family and I believe that if we keep spending time together, have fun, handle situations, and keep things positive, we will be closer as a family and we will be able to deal with family crisis situations in the future.

Family Relations Week 8

Affairs Always Ruin a Marriage

I can see spouses who have affairs with another person can make their spouses feel sadness, angry, and unloved. I know one woman, who has an ex-husband, that she was married to for many years and have children together. One day, she walked in to her ex- husband’s office and saw him having affair with another woman. She was heartbroken and she found out that her ex-husband cheated on her with lots of women, for many years, at the time they were married. It was a really hard time for her. She couldn’t take how angry she was with her ex-husband who broke the family. Today, she has been divorced for six or seven years. She slowly forgave her ex-husband with all the pain that he gave her. She finds ways to have peace and move on in her life. She visits her children (who are married and have children) and she always taught her sons how to be a better husband and father. Her sons listen her advice and are grateful that they have a mother that cares about them. She is happy to think about her sons and teach them how to become better people. The marriage with her ex-husband who had an affair does not affect her anymore because she chose to move on with her life.

I learned in class this week, what ruins marriage and hurt spouses is having fantasies with another person in their head, Facebook messages with the opposite sex every day, having a romantic relationship with someone else, being sexually involved with others, and sharing emotional feelings with others. The reason why spouses want to have an affair and have experiences with someone else is because they are tired and do not have feelings for their spouses anymore, like they were before. I have to say that it is wrong. I’ll tell you why. You never know how much you will hurt your spouse and how much you will damage their feelings. Marriage is about loving your spouse, no matter what and focus on them every day.

I know that the reason that married couples got married in the first place is because they love each other. Your spouse will always be your best friend if you will be faithful, loyal, and honest with them every day. Avoid having affairs! Focus with your spouse and build your marriage every day.

Family Relations Week 7

First Year of Marriage

I have heard many stories that couples struggle during their first year of marriage. The first year can be tough. There will be frustrations and tears. There will be fights, disagreements, and some changes. In marriage, there will be times when spouses are too busy and have no time to go out on a date. Some couples will wonder if they made the right decision to be married.

I know deep down that marriage is hard work and can be a challenge. However, you and your spouse got married for a reason. Remember the reason you fell in love with them in the first place. Your spouse is your best friend and your only best friend. In your marriage, there will be times you will get in fights or disagree on something. You can find ways to be patient with your spouse and talk calmly on ways you can work it out. Marriage is team work! If you keep your problems from your spouse, you will feel miserable in your marriage. Talk to your spouse, because they love you and want to make you happy. Your spouse will always be a good listener, don’t be afraid to talk to them about everything. If you and your spouse keep your marriage strong and super fun, you’ll have a happier marriage and you will feel that you made the right decision to marry your best friend.

Most importantly, you and your spouse should work together on a schedule for date nights and activities. If you go on a date once a week and do activities together every day, you’ll have fun in your marriage and build a strong relationship with your spouse.

Family Relations Week 6

Preparing For Marriage

Preparing for marriage is a big step for a man and a woman. I heard marriage can be enjoyable and exciting. However, it is hard work and couples need to work together as a team to keep their marriage strong. In class on Tuesday, we learned about the “Know-Quo” and what it means. There are three lists on what couples can do to spend time together and how to put your marriage first. First, Talk. Which means mutual self-dis-closer. Couples should talk together every day and share their thoughts and feelings with each other. Married couples should openly communicate their view points about certain subjects. Second, togetherness. This means spending time together and doing activities together. If couples have school or work that gets in the way of spending time together, they should make room in their schedule for their spouse. Spending time with your spouse builds a strong relationship and can help you have a good time together. Third, Time. Spend more quality time with your spouse by putting them first. If you make the time to get to know your spouse, you will feel joy, peace, and love. If you put your time with spouse, you will get to know them really well and understand who they are. If married couples know each other extremely well and understand who they are, they will trust their spouses and commit to them at all times.

Marriage can be hard work, but at the same time it can be fun if you make it fun. Remember, always prepare for marriage. Men and women should be prepared financially, have everything planed early before you get married, and practice communicating with your spouse, so that way you are on the same page all the time. Most importantly in marriage, always tell your spouse that you love them, serve them, and enjoy the best moments together. Make your marriage worth it!

Family Relations Week 5

I Love My Siblings!!!!

My classmates and I read “Sisters Give Siblings Better Health.” This article talks about why having siblings is a good idea and what helps each sibling to have a healthy family relationship. Brigham Young University professor, Laura Padilla-Walker, says, “Even after you account for parents’ influence, siblings do matter in unique ways.” She continues by saying, “They give kids something that parents don’t.” I love this quote, because I grew up with older siblings who taught me everything that I need to know in life and how to become a better person. Laura Padilla-Walker states that, “Statistical analyses showed that having a sister protected adolescents from feeling lonely, unloved, guilty, self-conscious and fearful. It didn’t matter whether the sister was younger or older, or how far apart the siblings were agewise.” She also says, “This doesn't mean brothers don't matter. The study found that having a loving sibling of either gender promoted good deeds, such as helping a neighbor or watching out for other kids at school. In fact, loving siblings fostered charitable attitudes more than loving parents did. The relationship between sibling affection and good deeds was twice as strong as that between parenting and good deeds.” In my life, my siblings and I look out for each other, serve each other, and spend time with each other, because we know that family always comes first.

If you want to learn more about the article, go to this website. http://news.byu.edu/archive10-aug-siblings.aspx

In my family, I have one brother and two sisters. They are all amazing and taught me a lot of things about life. My brother, Robert, taught me to have patience whenever my two sisters were bugging me. He taught me to love one another and to enjoy hanging out with the family. My sister, Meghan, taught me how to be independent and how to take care of myself. She taught me how to stand up for myself and have courage. My other sister, Lindsey, taught me how to wear cute clothes and told me where the most popular stores are to shop. She taught me how to enjoy life and to be myself around others.

I have no idea what I would do without my brother, Robert, and my two sisters, Meghan and Lindsey. They are my rocks and we love spending time together. There are times that we drive each other crazy. However, we have learned how to forgive each other and forget all the dumb situations that we fight about. We love each other and we cannot hate each other. My siblings taught me a lot of things about life and how to become a better person. Without my siblings, I wouldn’t be the woman that I am today.

Family Relations Week 4

Does It Matter Where We Came From?

Families have different cultures and lifestyles. Some come from rich families, middle class families, poor families, religious families, non-religious families, and many more. It’s amazing how many families come from very interesting cultures and how they live their lives. It is fun to learn about different families. However, there are some different family cultures who don’t believe other family cultures and will judge them. For example, if you are Christian and you come from a family that believes in Christ, there are some people out there who will judge your religion. Not a lot, but some. Families who have different religions sometimes argue with other families’ beliefs and tell them that they are wrong. It is very sad. There are also families out there who are prejudiced against other social classes.

Say you have tons of money and you came from a very rich family, and went to a school where the students there are not wealthy as you are. Some of the students may not like you, because you come from a family where you have a big house, nice cars, and other nice things. If you are that rich person, you will feel sad and confused because your classmates at school, with different lifestyles from you, want to punish you because of where you came from. I can say it’s called jealousy and kind of selfish. However, not all poor people are like that with other different social classes.

There is a video I want all of you to watch. It is called Tammy’s Story. I think you will learn what this lady went through and how much she is grateful for where she came from and she doesn’t care what other people think about her and her environment.  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=37ZpauS5Doo

It is all about being grateful for what you have and where you came from. It doesn’t matter what other people think about you and your family’s culture. Be grateful for what you are. Don’t be an ashamed of who you are. Most importantly, DO NOT JUDGE OTHERS. We should not judge other people’s cultures and their lifestyles. We all come from a different social class, but we are all the same people. Don’t worry about other people’s cultures and social classes. Worry about your culture and your lifestyle, and try to be grateful for it.

 

 

Family Relations Week 3

No Family Is Perfect!

Having a perfect family means no negative problems or situations in the family. Every family member is perfect and will never be angry at each other. That is an awesome family to be part of. However, there are some families out there today that are not doing too well. There are some families in the world that are living in abusive homes, doing drugs and alcohol, dealing with unemployment, and having family relationship problems. Children who live with parents that are not getting along with each other, tend to cause the children to think it is their fault that the parents are fighting and the children will feel anxiety at home. Negative family situations will cause family members not to feel peace at home and not to feel loved by family members. Some may have depression, and have trouble imagining what families are supposed to be. This will create negative feedback in the family that will make the children think love isn’t enough for them. This is why we need family therapists today. They can understand the families’ problems and know information and how the situation all started. A family therapist can help regulate parents and children’s emotions, and what family situations hurt them the most. For example, if I was family therapist and I’m sitting across from family members that are going through not getting along with each other, I will do whatever I can to understand each of them, where they are coming from and what they are feeling inside, and give them advice on how to fix it.

It’s important for family therapists to ask each family member questions. Family therapist need to figure out what questions they can truthfully ask the family members that are going through serious problems, like losing a job, doing drugs and alcohol, and having trouble with the law. Here are the questions that you can ask a family member from the “Genograms in Family System” that my classmates and I read for homework before class. “Has anyone in the family had a serious medical or psychological problem? Been depressed? Had anxieties? Fears? Lost control? Has there been physical or sexual abuse? Are there any other problems that worry you? Have there been any recent job changes? Unemployment? How do you like your job? Do you think any members drink too much or have a drug problem? Have any family members ever been arrested? For what? When?” (Page 37). Those questions will help the family therapist know what to do to help the family members and how to get the family to be happy and healthy again. If all the family members keep going to family therapy, it will help them to know how to become a better family and solve their problems and understand each other.

I know deep down that not all families are perfect. There will be times when you have arguments, don’t agree on something, or don’t want to be around each other. However, I know all families can work out their problems and forgive each other. It is important to work together as a team with your family and love them no matter what. Heavenly Father gave us families for a reason; to teach us how to forgive and love one another. Families in the world today should make a goal to fill their homes with peace, love, happiness, joy, and health. This will bring positive feedback to the children and the parents.

    

Family Relations Week 2

Who Doesn’t Love Children???? I Do!!!!!

 This week, I learned from my teacher that there are some people in our population believe that we should not bring many children into this world because there are too many people on the earth. Since “The Population Bomb” by Paul Ehrlich came out, many thought that populations would always grow and nothing will happen. While populations were growing, fertility rates were actually declining. In 1971, the United States fertility rate dropped to below 2.13 children per woman. The 2.13 children per woman is an important number because it is called the replacement fertility rate. With fertility above 2.13 children per woman, populations will grow in the long run. And with fertility below this rate, populations will eventually decline. Many people today think having many children are expensive and you do not need a tradition family. Some parents think having one, two, or three children will be good enough. The size of the family is the choice of the parents.

Heavenly Father’s plan for us is to bring His spirit children to earth. Every child should experience how to learn, work, and serve others on earth. Parents should have the joy bringing children on earth and have happiness in a family. Heavenly Father wants us to not give up bringing children into the world, even though it can be expensive. However, parents can make the decisions and timing when they want to have children. It is between them and the Lord.

Personal:

My goal as a future mother is have a big family. I want my children to live in a safe, peaceful, and happy home. I love kids and they bring happiness to a family. I want to be a good parent to my children throughout their childhood and teenage years, before they go out to the world by themselves. I know that every spirit child wants to come on this earth and to be tested by their Heavenly Father.  

 

 

 

My name is Caitlin Christison. I love running, I love to cook, hang out my family and friends, and spending time with my fiancé (which I will steal his last name on August 22, 2015). ;D My blog is going to be about Family Relations, the importance of families, and the happiness that can come with families. I will be posting pictures and write about Family Relations. I hope you enjoy this research that I am going to write about families. Have a happy day and always!:)